From the bitter sweetness 

of painful pleasure you were spawned,

into your existence,

into my existence



Your exit was your entry.

The obstacles of being manifested with your first breath.

The birth of life's unconscious lessons.



There is no greater obstacle in life than entering it. 

Only our memories bare witness. 



Just like the illuminating warmth of the morning sun 

I feel you light up my world

with your smile



You speak to me with your eyes

and my heart responds



As I write these words 

I watch you sleep

I watch you breath

You bathe in a peace and tranquility

that will be illusive to bear as 

life grows into you

as you into it;



I inhale your sweet breathe

that the elixir flows through

your body 

your blood 

your heart

your thoughts

          

I breathe you

I consume you

I am consumed by you

You become a part of me 



I watch you 

I feel you

I listen to you

I absorb you.



I live outside myself for you     

un-autonomously relinquishing my identity from



                     'a man'



                         to 



                    'a parent'



I think of images instead of words

as words alone cannot express my love.



But my images are blurred 

by the salty wells in my eyes.



I never knew that this overwhelming

'thing' called 'love' 

could cause such beautiful pain 





I guess this is what it feels like to be your father.











Billy Kavellaris